1. Excuse me, but do you give head to strangers? ... No? Well in that case let me introduce myself.
2. If I sleep on the wetspot, will you come home with me tonight?
3. My friends left me by myself, can I come home with you?
4. If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep in until the afternoon.
5. Most people are watching the Vancouver Olympics, but I'd rather talk to you cause the chance of meeting someone so special only happens once in a lifetime.
6. Hi, my name is Doug. That's "god" spelled backwards with a little bit of you wrapped up in it.
7. I never thought I could love to look at someone as much as I love to look at myself! Well done!
8. I have rediculously large feet... enough said?
9. My place or yours?
10. Hi there, my name is John, I would like to welcome you to the first day of the rest fo your life.

Do you even need to ask?
Ok then, here it is!










The Top 10 worst things you can do on a first date.

10. Talk about how much your date reminds you of your ex.
9.  Stop halfway through the date and call home to ask your parents if you can stay out past your bedtime.
8.  Ask your date if they think 5 kids is too many, or if 4 would be enough to keep you both happy.
7.  Fart moments before you get in the car (believe me, it does not air out properly before you get in!).
6.  Flirt with the waitsatff in hopes that you will appear more desirable.
5.  Eat spicy food (refer to #7).
4.  Ask if your hands look fat in this outfit.
3.  Admit that you are a bit of a puker when you drink, and then proceed to get totally wasted.
2.  Lick the other person's ear when they are not looking (don't ask, all I can tell you is that this doesn't end well).
1.  End the date by asking for their best friend's phone number.

Try a few if you don't believe me, and let me know how it goes :)

- Happy dating everbody!

Most people will go through a variety of breakups throughout the course of their lives. Some are easy to get over, some are easy to get under, and others seem to destroy the very fabric of your being.

So why do relationships even have to end? You probably thought it was going pretty well, right? WRONG!

The reality is, that if the relationship ended, somebody did something wrong. Unintentionally or not, a relationship ends when one or more persons decides that you are simply no longer a match.

It may not be your fault, or it actually could be your fault. The only way to truly know is by scanning through this list to see if you did any one or more of the following things. If so, you may want to reconsider your strategy in the next relationship.

If you don't fall in any of the following Top 10's, then hey, you are probably not the reason. And when they gave you the classic, "it's not you, it's me." they may have actually meant it.


The Top 10 Reasons Why Relationships Fail

#10. You were caught cheating

#9. You call every night to make sure your lover made it home safe. (If you are thinking, "what's wrong with that?" you might as well stop reading now)

#8. After only a couple months of dating, you started farting under the covers

#7. Your best friend always hangs out with both of you, even on Friday nights. (Friday is DATE night people! Not, hang with your best friend who you feel sorry for because thay don't have anyone.)

#6. You show up randomly at the other persons work saying that you wanted to surprise them. (The reality is that you were checking in to make sure there was no mid-day hanky panky going on)

#5. You forced the other person to go to your church every Sunday, even though they are not religious.

#4. You obsess about everything! (So not cool, and seriously annoying)

#3. You work more than 10 hours everyday, and even on weekends.

#2. You decided that sex is something that should be saved for special occasions such as birthdays and Christmas.

#1. By far the biggest reason why relationships fail. (Whether you want to hear it or not). You let yourself go. (Weight gain, hair where it shouldn't be, skipping showers etc. It all adds up people!)

Now that we have cleared that up, it is time to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move on to the next relationship (or possibly rebound). There are tons of single people out there, so enjoy yourself!

It will only be a matter of time before you wind up in a relationship all over again.

-Safe dating my friends!

First date questions must be carefully planned and carefully structured in order to get the most information without seeming too nosey or intrusive. The idea is to ask questions that will seem innocent and normal, while in reality you are actually scrutinizing every aspect of your date’s responses.


Here are the Top 10 first date questions you should definitely ask.


1. So what kind of work do you do?
This is one of the most crucial questions that you should get out of the way right off the bat. It is an easy question to ask, everyone in his or her right mind should be expecting it, and it can tell you a lot about a person. Caring people work in charity organizations, money-hungry people work in financial firms, narcissistic people work as personal trainers etc.

2. So, what are you going to order?
If you are out for dinner this is an awesome question to ask, but you only have a limited window to ask it in. If you wait until the order is taken, you can’t ask anymore, you already know. If you ask in advance, what will often happen is your date will tell you what they are ordering, and justify why they are ordering it. Humans can’t help it, they justify everything when asked. “I think I will order the steak. I love red meat, I always have, ever since I was a kid I…’ “I am going to have a salad. Not that I am on a diet or anything… well I kind of am, you see…”

3. Have you lived here all your life?
A great questions! The response to this one can tell you so much about how "emotionally" open a person is. If your date responds with, “oh my whole life.” and ends there – EMOTIONALLY SHUT DOWN. If they respond with, “Oh, my whole life. I was actually born at trinity Hospital in…” and continues – OPEN BOOK. They will share everything with you, and probably even cry in the movie later.

4. What kind of car do you drive?
This is a two-element question. If you get asked this on a first date, run for the hills, sounds like a moneygrubber to me. If you ask this on the first date, find out exactly how much your date cares about their car. People who dedicated blood sweat and tears to their ride, often have little time to share that same emotional connection with you. And people who buy $80,000 cars with a $100,000 salary are often overcompensating for something.

5. Do you have any pets?
Good One! Pets are important. They show love, compassion, and understanding for another living being. They are also dirty, smelly, and annoying, but who’s judging. A person who owns a pet is a great quality, but what kind of pet they have is a different story and can tell you a lot. Dog lovers are in crazy need of attention, cat lovers need sympathy, fish lovers are obsessive, lizard lovers are weird, and gerbil lovers are… I wont even go there. Etc, etc, etc…

6. How many relationships have you had in the past?
Just about everyone asks this one. Humans always want to know what they are up against, but to be honest, I am not sure this question tells you anything more than, “Oh wow, that is a lot, I wonder why.” Or “Hmmm, that is not very many, I wonder why.” Save yourself the trouble and stick to question that come with answers, not more questions.

7. Are your parents still together?
This is the ultimate tell tale of whether or not your date will have commitment issues later on down the road. FACT: Children of divorced homes have commitment issues – Yes, they do. Children of parents who are still together do not have these same issues.

8. Are your parents active?
This is not as obvious as the other questions; however, it is one of the most important. People who have active fit parents, tend to stay fit themselves. Children learn by mimicking their parents. Kids who grew up watching their dad drink beer and eat chips will likely do the same. Kids who grew up watching their parents stay active and participate in outdoor activities, will likely do the same.

9. What is your favourite movie?
A simple but effective question in determining the level of depth a person goes for in their entertainment. A person who absolutely loved 300, is not looking for the same type of depth of someone who loved The Reader. And believe me, this does matter. Dumming your brain to the tune of 300 is not good for someone who needs the emotional stimulation of The Reader.

10. What is your favourite book?
You will be surprised at how many people cannot answer this question, simply because they can’t remember the last time they read a book. If you are one of those people, I simply don’t know what to say to you. For those of you who do read, you probably already know why this question is so damn important!

There is no short supply of myths about the female orgasm. So DatemeDammit! has decided to do away with the most common ones. Enjoy!

The Top 10 Female Orgasm Myths

1. A woman must have an orgasm to feel sexually satisfied.

TRUTH: Most women would agree that orgasm is the icing on the cake, but the truth is, it is not necessary. Many women report feeling just as satisfied after sex, even without orgasm. They often find that the emotional aspect is just as rewarding as the physical


2. Vaginal orgasms are better than clitoral orgasms.

TRUTH: Every woman is different, and have varying preferences when it comes to orgasm. For some, vaginal intercourse is the only way that they can reach orgasm, while for others; they require manual stimulation of the G-Spot. It all comes down to knowing your body and what your body likes.


3. A circumcised penis decreases a woman’s ability to experience orgasm.

TRUTH – A circumcision has absolutely nothing to do with how a woman experiences orgasm. The reality is that a circumcision only removes a tiny portion of the skin at the front of the penis, and will have no effect on how you experience sex with a man.


4. Condoms affect a woman’s ability to orgasm.

TRUTH: Condoms come in so many shapes and sizes that even if there is one brand that reduces your sensitivity, you can always try one of the more extreme kinds in order to enhance your orgasmic experience. Many people report ribbed condoms as an effective method for increasing sexual excitement


5. The larger the penis, the greater the chance of female orgasm.

TRUTH: There are hardly any nerve endings in the far end of the vagina, so size truly does not make a difference. Given that the G-Spot is located about two inches deep within the vagina, the average-sized penis can stimulate it very easily. So what it really comes down to is how well he uses the size that he has.


6. A Women's desire for orgasm is not as strong as a man’s

TRUTH: Consider that a woman's clitoris contains as many nerves as the head of a man's penis, but are compacted into a much smaller area. The sensations she feels there can be very intense. Some women are also able to achieve multiple orgasms, whereas men are not as well equipped to do so.


7. Women Need it Hard and Fast to Achieve Orgasm

TRUTH: Every woman is different, and every woman requires different stimulation in order to achieve orgasm. The reality is that for some women, simple fondling the nipples can be enough to reach orgasm, while for others it can take hours of G-Spot stimulation.


8. Most Women Don’t Masturbate

TRUTH: 82% of women report having tried masturbation at least once in their life. While it is not for everyone, it can be an effective means of reaching orgasm on a regular basis.


9. All Females Can Have Multiple Orgasms

TRUTH: Some women will experience multiple orgasms on a regular basis, while for others this may never occur. The recovery time required for additional orgasms is often very short for females, but can be as long as 24 hours. It is perfectly normal to only achieve one orgasm on a regular basis.


10. Females cannot ejaculate.

TRUTH: Many people believe that women do not ejaculate. This is a myth; women do ejaculate, it is a non-lubricating fluid that is simply wet. It is a relatively new acknowledgment within the scientific community; however, there is plenty of evidence to support the claim.

Is this even fair!? Simply smiling at a guy signals you want to hook up... doesn't it?
















Well.... here are the Top 10 Female Pick Up Lines anyway.

10. You remind me of a Twinkie: Every time I bite into you, you cream in my mouth.

9. Here's a quarter....call your roommate and tell him you won't be coming home tonight.

8. Hi, I may not be the hottest girl in the bar, but I am already drunk, and my house is across the street.

7. I'm new in town, I bet a guy like you knows his way around.

6. Anyone wanna buy me a drink?

5. I have always wondered what it would be like to kiss a girl.

4. Today is going to be the luckiest day of your life.

3. I love to sleep naked, cook naked, do everything naked... don't you?

2. I'm tired, can I sleep in your bed tonight?

1. This bra is really itchy!

What would dating be without those good old love songs? We scoured the internet in search of the greatest love songs of all time, and we came across this list.

It turns out that a survey was conducted in New York in 2007 asking people to vote for the top 10 best love songs of all time. This list is the result of that survey. DateMeDammit is a bit skeptical about whether or not these are the best love songs of all time. We think it can be improved.

Let us know what you think about this list. Are these the greatest love songs that represent your generation? Feel free to add a comment with a top 10 list of your own.


The Top 10 Greatest Love Songs of All Time

1. Marvin Gaye - “Let’s Get It On” Listen Now

2.  Percy Sledge - “When a Man Loves a Woman” Listen Now

3.  The Righteous Brothers -“Unchained Melody” Listen Now

4.  Roberta Flack -“Killing Me Softly With His Song” Listen Now

5. Boyz II Men - "I'll Make Love To You" Listen Now

6.  Elvis Presley - “Are You Lonesome Tonight?” Listen Now

7.  The Beatles - “In My Life” Listen Now

8. Stevie Wonder - “I Just Called to Say I Love You” Listen Now

9. The Jackson 5 - "I'll Be There" Listen Now

10. The Temptations - "My Girl" Listen Now

1. When you first meet your date at the restaurant, dressed in your nicest clothes, your date comments on how underdressed you look.

2. When the waiter asks if you would like a drink to start with, your date replies, "Yes, and make it a double" while grumbling under their breath, "It's going to be a long night."

3. Every time your date's phone rings, they answer and you hear them say, "No it's ok, I can talk. I am just on a date with some guy/girl right now."

4. During conversation, your date continually asks you to, "Please stop talking"

5. Your date keeps looking at their watch.

6. Your date excuses him/herself to go to the bathroom, and never comes back.

7. After pounding 4 or 5 shots right at the table, they tell you how much you remind them of their ex.

8. When the waiter asks about desert, your date blurts out, "No, from the looks of things my date has had one too many deserts in their life time. Just the check please."

9. Your date suddenly remembers that they have an early meeting the next morning. Even though it is a Saturday.

10. Your date calls their ex to come pick them up at the end of the night.

We all say stupid things about or ex after a breakup. The great thing about celebrities is that when they say something stupid, it is on record for the whole world to share.

Here are the top 10 celebrity breakup quotes that are sure to amuse.



1. “That girl [Jessica Simpson], for me, is a drug. And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them. Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me. Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm."
--John Mayer

2. "Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable."
---Cher

3. "Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet"
--Robin Williams

4. "Is there a cure for a broken heart? Only time can heal your broken heart, just as time can heal his broken arms and legs."
--Miss Piggy

5. "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."
--Sharon Stone

6. "There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn't stand for that."
--Steve Martin.

7. "I just wanted to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don't know what that's about. But, enjoy the game tonight."
--Sean Avery (about Dion Phaneuf stealing his girlfriend)

8. “Every woman should have four pets in her life. A mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass who pays for everything.”
--Paris Hilton

9. "Well, I can finally wear high-heals again!"
--Nocole Kidman (about shorty Tom Cruise)

10. Billy Idol called... He wants his look back."
--Jennifer Aniston (about Bard Pitt)